Sasha's written mirror.

To the next harbor, MATEY!

2010-05-11T23:14:00.003+10:00

got bad news:

Will no longer update this blog. This sailor is bored, and my anchor chose another harbor to weighed in.

Good news:

www.mushadool.tumblr.com is very welcome for you to read.

SEE YA THERE!

Just another day for me.

2010-04-17T07:46:00.004+10:00

You're not really in a relationship yet (with anyone) if you haven't experienced disappointment.

Major disappointment, if i might add.

I'm done giving labels.
Girl friends.
Boy friends.
Best friends.

All crap.

Off i go,
muSHAdool.

an end of an era, i hate you.

2010-04-07T19:55:00.005+10:00

I will miss having someone to talk to when i'm bored.

I will miss knocking on their doors and ask them, "hey, wanna hang out or something?"

I will miss listening to their loud music next door,

their loud alarm that woke me up sometimes.

I will miss having ears to talk to when I'm mad with the crazy landlords.

I will miss their craziness when it comes to birthday surprises.

I will miss.. having housemates.

kinda blamed my mom for this. Parents and their conservativeness.

but oh well, obedience is the least thing i could give to them.

ah, whatever.

i know i'll wake up two days from now and will be totally fine.

always have, always will.

sorry for my momentary melancholy.

P.S: Time, you're a bitch.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Waiting for you, sunsh!

2010-03-06T17:22:00.006+11:00

"Don't cry... Look, the sky is crying with you."

That's okay,

i'll just learn how to dance in the midst of rain.

If you know sunshine loves you, you won't mind when rain comes.

Rain, hail, storm, they'll eventually come.

Sunshine is just taking a rest,

when he's back, he'll shine so bright, he'll make your skin sparkle.

Not in a Edward Cullen cheesy way tho.

Off i go,

the sunshine lover, muSHAdool.

Too. Random. Day.

2010-02-28T00:33:00.014+11:00

I don't normally post something on my blog just about how did my day go.

It's what amateurs bloggers do, and I'm kinda... not. LOL. *self-indulgence*

So... today.

I started my day by asking..

"Is Melbourne really this boring? Nothing new?"

Just like they say...

be careful of what you wish for.

I just had the longest day ever.

Day went normally at the beginning,

had lunch with Nanad, Nita and her mom at Boxhill,

gave them some tour at Boxhill for they are the new Melburnian.

then after few hours we dropped them off at their house.

the day just started for me and my girl.

we were sitting in the tram, listening to our own ipod,

our very different-on-the-inside ipod,

but then.. suddenly..

Our tram hit the brake because it crashed a car.

I've lived here for about a year,

and this is THE FIRST accident i personally experienced.

FYI, in Australia, accidents really are accidents.

it's not like back in my hometown, Indonesia,

where accidents are like every journalists' secondly consumption.

Accidents happen too often, sometimes i feel bad for not feeling bad.

Then,

we arrived at the City, we were heading to a friend's apartment.

we got lost, pretty much.

until finally we've arrived,

we... got locked in the emergency exit.

Ah..

i'm too tired to explain why the hell we got locked.

story short, i just glad i didn't let my girl go home earlier.

because if she wasn't there, probably now i'm still locked.

the sweaty, signal-less, clueless me.

THEN...

(yes the story still continues)

when we arrived at the apartment,

our 2 guy-friends were there, laughing their ass off because we were too stupid,

we got lost, then we got locked. yes, it's very laughable. dang it.

then, one of the guys went into the toilet and left his computer unattended,

what two crazy girls did?

yes, we sneaked around.

What we discovered that day about our 2 guy friends:

Internet history: Asian Porn Video.

Internet porn stored at their harddisk: 70 GB.

HAHAHAHAHAH.

I know this might be very usual for you but it's not for us!!

This porn stuff really freaked us out ;p

Oh.. guys always will be guys.

So, in the nutshell, two points today:

1. Be careful what you wish for.

2. Never look into someone's personal computer, knowing too much is stressing!

hahaha. anyway,

i just glad that even stupid prayer got answered ;)

Off i go,

the very random muSHAdool.

You're so bright i have to wear shades.

2010-02-27T02:10:00.004+11:00

He's not seeking to those who crave for spotlight.

He's not seeking to those who know it all.

He's not seeking to those who are multitalented.

Don't even get me started on good looks.

He's seeking to those,

who were once so deeply broken,

healthy self-image were not their cup of tea,

they seem didn't have any future,

help were all they need.

But their heart are pure, their eyes sparkles,

because of him, their future are so bright, they have to wear shades.

He knows that even though a diamond was being put among trash,

it still is a diamond.

Even though a diamond didn't have a good past,

it still is a diamond.

Even though,

a diamond is not really the centre of attention,

a diamond is not being invited to high class parties and events,

a diamond might not have the prettiest face or alluring body,

or a sexy Facebook profile picture,

it still is a diamond.

It only needs few cleansing and trash-detox,

voila. A diamond shines so brightly. Ready to wow the world.

Ready to bless.

Yes, realized that i've been talking too metaphorically.

but change every "diamond" word by.. "you."

yes, you.

the heart-broken, lonely, purposeless you.

the once heart broken, lonely, purposeless me.

Ready to shine, diamonds? :)

P.S: thanks for the missions. 2 people in 2 hours?

you must trust me so much, ey? :D

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

my current muse: ALPHABEAT.

2010-02-25T00:04:00.002+11:00

singing... YOUUUUUUUU, YOUUU TURN ME UPSIDE DOWNNNN,

WHENEVER YOU'RE AROUUUUNDDDDD.

i'm all about artsy stuff,

artsy music,

artsy hotties are very welcome ;p

off i go,

muSHAdool.

Say.. what???

2010-02-24T23:44:00.006+11:00

Have you.... ever felt like...

your life resemble other person's life,

too many

too scary

too uncanny??

A brief update,

i successfully enrolled to Bachelor of Arts program (as you know, Creative and Professional Writing major) in Deakin University, Melbourne.

Hoping i could be a writer one day, through my next 2 years of study.

so... i took a class, core unit, i have to take it.

guess... what....

It's the same class that this person once took,

WRITING: FINDING A VOICE.

That's the class she once took (in Ugly Betty TV series season 1),

and the class i'm taking now.

Same subject. Same pronunciation.

So.. once again,

Have you.... ever felt like...

your life resemble other person's life,

too many

too scary

too uncanny??

although i don't believe in coincidences. Everything in this world made, discovered, created, only for a great purpose.

Off i go,

la betty muSHAdool.

it's the new girl in town!

2010-02-23T00:00:00.009+11:00

Talking about do more remarkable stuff...

13 years old.

Once reviewed by Vogue Paris and Style.com

Here's the link.

http://tavi-thenewgirlintown.blogspot.com/

Get inspired.

In case, you were too speechless why she can do all of those, and ashamed of your age,

just bear in mind,

she discovered her passion sooner.

you should too.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Yo soy la Betty.

2010-02-22T23:16:00.012+11:00

I'm back being an aspiring (read:struggling) student in Melbie.

Back in my small room,

still and will always be messy.

I went through my stack of magazines.

Feeling very guilty for not reading them in about 4 months.

I know they miss me oh so badly.

Then i blamed myself for being very lavish,

Then i felt good again,

because well, how do i say this in fancy words..

it's my passion.

okay, that wasn't so fancy.

then... LOOK what i found in the middle of that chaotic mess.

IT'S THE MAGAZINE I WROTE, I MADE, I PRODUCED, 2 YEARS AGO!

(with a little help from my apparently-they're-better-in-Photoshop-than-me piggies)

Like that's not "oh-dear-diary" moment enough..

i also found these.

my 17th birthday present from Henry Gerson.

my 18th birthday present from Theophilia Edwinda.

and this is my first ever book.

Well it was a group project but as you know,

world is so fair that you ended up have to work alone.

Yes, that was sarcasm.

This is (for once) not a random stuff i want to post,

this is such a reminder.

to me and to you.

What's your passion?

How's the progress?

Have you ever made or accomplished something significant?

In my case,

i haven't. My magazine and my book were assignments i made as a media student.

But i haven't really contributed that much.

Yes, i also found the magazine i contributed in, which was my church magazine.

(Yah.. dibaca 5000 orang boleh lahh walopun majalah gereja hihi.)

but i feel like i should contribute more, i should do more remarkable stuff.

Oh well.

i'm taking my first step.

In 2 weeks i'll officially start being a CREATIVE AND PROFESSIONAL WRITING university student.

after graduated from Diploma of media and communication student last year.

I'm SO PUMPED, can't wait to start.

One day, once my career blast off,

i'll look at these days and

i'll know,

i once made a good decision to follow my passion.

Follow yours, peeps.

or unless you'll look back and couldn't help but feeling regretful.

Off i go,

the indeed still very homesick muSHAdool.

Bye blonde bitch, hello redhead.

2010-02-16T05:12:00.004+11:00

Still in the spirit of Chinese New Year,

i dyed my hair red.

What do you think? Is it good?

Of course it is. *Self-indulgence*

Off i go,

redheaded muSHAdool.

Gifted and would like to be a gift.

2010-02-16T05:06:00.003+11:00

Yeay.

Got a magnificent gift!!

I know it's still an early stage,

but i'll train, work, practice harder.

for good. and for good only.

Ready for another mission!

Ahiiiiiiiiyyyyyyyyyyyy!

P.S: Happy Valentine's Day plus Chinese New Year to you all!

Love letter through a movie.

2010-02-13T17:45:00.008+11:00

"I have something for you, wait 'til Friday."

Okay, i can't wait to see what it is.

Then, my friend asked me out, we had dinner and we planned to watch movies.

i suggested this,

but then,

my friend insisted. he said, "I've watched the trailer and it's good. let's go see this."

So there i was, with my friend, watching this,

I seriously didn't expect anything,

didn't expect that my heart will beat so darn fast,

didn't expect that i will get so deeply smitten,

because of the message of this movie.

So, this movie basically is about Percy Jackson, he's special. he's half god and half human.

or he's demigod. what so called.

he had a mission, and through his journey, he had obstacles and problems.

but the voice of his father, the god of water, Poseidon, led him the way.

He led Percy through his voice.

and only Percy, the son, that could hear the god's voice.

so yea yada yada yada, Percy could get the mission done and he's visiting the heaven,

where Poseidon is.

I.. still don't get the message.

but then,

at the end of the movie,

this conversation struck me.

"Son, i helped you to get here."

"Yes, i heard your voice."

"Son, even though I'm not there for you physically,

but I will always watch your every move from above,

I’ll always be with you, in your thoughts and dreams."

Voila.

There was the surprise.

It might be as simple as one line from a movie to you,

but it meant the world for me.

The words i love the most, through the media i love the most.

He knows me well.

I wrote this the morning after,

and i.am.still.deeply.smitten.

Oh for you who don't get this, never mind.

it's not you, it's me who is abnormal.

*wink*

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Yes, i know i will always have You.

2010-02-11T04:40:00.008+11:00

One night, in a land faraway,

a little girl is having a pillow talk with her Daddy.

===================================================

A little girl:

Daddy… why do people have feelings?

Daddy:

What do you mean, my dear?

A little girl:

I mean.. why did you create us with feelings? Why you let us feel weak, so powerless..

Somehow I think people should have numb hearts, they shouldn’t feel anything.

Then, they won’t get hurt,

they won’t cry in the middle of the night because their heart is so deeply broken,

or simply because they’re not ready for saying another goodbye.

Daddy:

You mean… like you right now?

A little girl:

you got me.

Daddy:

Well, cutie pie, when you feel weak, that’s when I can show how much I love you the most.

Because you need Me the most when you’re weak.

If you never feel weak, how can you know that I'm always here to strengthen you?

If you never feel left out, how can you know that you still have Me?

If you never feel hurt, how can you know that I'm your healer?

If you never say goodbye, how can you know that I, for even a second never leave you?

My dear, you’re not weak for feeling weak.

Strong people are not those who can’t feel a thing,

But those who are brave enough to face it, and don’t let feelings control them.

It's what they do during that-feeling-weak-time, that shows whether they're strong or not.

Little girl:

What do strong people do when they're feeling weak, Daddy?

Daddy:

They don't rely on people. They rely on Me.

They don't come to people. They come to Me.

Because they know that people are unreliable. But I'm their rock.

Little girl:

You always know what to say, huh?

Daddy:

Haha. Like Father, like daughter, dear.

Anyway, go get some sleep.

Get ready for a better tomorrow.

Don’t forget,

I love you. and all of your weakness.

No, ESPECIALLY your weakness.

Good night.

That little girl went to sleep,

knowing that no matter how tough life gets,

she always has her Daddy.

============================================================

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

TRP - Totally Random Post.

2010-02-05T04:27:00.003+11:00

B says: (12:18:47 AM)

stabbed, randomness, lenje2 people. i cant imagine your life.

Sasha says: (12:27:33 AM)

now you know why I HAVE to be a bitch, right?

Well, not that kind.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Bye (again)!

2010-01-24T06:11:00.004+11:00

After a FRIKIN FUNTASTIC good 10 days in Spore,

i will be off again for another 10 days,

to the land of Sura and Baya.

Pigging out is guaranteed at this wonderfully hot city.

Oh goodbye hot bikini body with sexy tattoo on my hip.

The picture is getting blur-er than ever.

Off i go,

sad piggy muSHAdool.

You only reap what you sow.

2010-01-24T05:58:00.004+11:00

Met up with a long-time-no-see friend of mine.

"I still remember, you asked me one day, "why don't you sing??"

she said.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SLehLafXgU

It's her first single on her first album.

Sow good words,

who knows one day you'll see one of your dearest friends winning an Oscar.

Off i go,

very dreamy muSHAdool.

VIVA COCO!

2010-01-21T22:26:00.002+11:00

Rot in hell, Jay Leno.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Faith is taking a step with eyes closed.

2010-01-19T21:11:00.007+11:00

"You will get married at 28 years old."

"You will be different than your sisters."

"You will lead an enjoyable life."

"Your future husband is so handsome."

"Your career will be so good, and so is your marriage life."

"I saw you, got the job you wanted."

Won't tell you what this is.

but one thing for sure,

this is not dreams.

Not mine.

6 confirmation in two days. wowza!

well, the lines of the day would be..

"Don't worry, dear. you're doing too great for such a young age."

"No matter what it is, i'm always here. to support you."

Off i go,

the VERY grateful and VERY humbled muSHAdool.

Crush of the week: Zachary Levi.

2010-01-19T20:44:00.006+11:00

"My job on my set, I believe,

is to first just love people and gain that trust with people where they know that I really do love them and care about their well-being.

so that when they are running into problems, they will hopefully, at some point, come to me and ask me,

'What is your peace all about? What is your comfort all about? Where do you get your love? Where do you get your talents?'

And I can turn to them and say without blinking, 'Jesus Christ.'

Well said, Chuck Bartowski. Well said.

Off i go watching "Chuck",

muSHAdool.

P.S: special thanks to Theophilia Edwinda for the info slash quotes :D

OFF I GO!

2010-01-06T06:31:00.002+11:00

Enjoy the last posting.

Wouldn't be able to post in upcoming days, or even weeks.

Off to the land of SINful engLISH with fellas,

muSHAdool.

Life in one-liners.

2010-01-06T06:13:00.014+11:00

It's a new year, it's a new life.
This is my almost 19 years of experience, living in this world. concise in one-liners.
Tweeted some of them before.
===================================================
In life..
giving up is okay, as long as you know you won't.

In life..
you have to choose your battle, because not every battle is worth fighting.

In life..
your family describe a lot about your true self. I'm a proud daughter.

In life..
"aim for 10, because when you fall, at least you got a 9 or an 8."
- my elementary school math teacher.

In life..
bad things happen, even to good people. Don't live on the edge, you're too close from falling.

In life..
be grateful for every pieces of your broken heart.
Each of them were torn to make you stronger and wiser.

In life..
just because you talk more, doesn't always mean you impact more.

In life..
dirty addiction and dirty sins don't make you a dirty man.
Grace and mercy are always there, doing their best job to clean you up.

In life..
know what you want, you're one step ahead everybody else already.

In life..
heavy make up and fancy clothes can't guarantee security and healthy self-image.

In life..
you will find so many people focusing on what is right or what is wrong, but the greatest question you should ask is.. what is wise? - Andy Stanley

In life..
friends come and go. But, those who are in the same direction with you will stay.

In life..
you have to enjoy every moment, because time really is the meanest bitch.

In life..
People try so hard to be different, yet they dress up, act, talk, very alike.

In life..
high school dramas never end, but only those with such boring life hoping they could be the queen someday.

In life..
harsh defensive words can't disguise broken and bitter heart. *slap to my own face*

In life..
You'll go study overseas just to realize home is where your heart and head truly belong.

In life..
A great community will lead you to a great future.
Big thanks to them, i know i have a bright one.

In life..
your heart will get broken so many times you stopped keeping track. But it's all because you just haven't met the right one yet. you will.
(Paraphrasing Mr. Buble)

In life..
You'll eventually ask,
"Why do all good things come to an end?"
I can give you an answer. Bear in your mind..
"Because better things are on their way, ready to replace."

This is how i see my life.
how do you see yours?
------------------------------------------------

Posted this on my facebook note, got amazing feedback,

*which were oddly sent personally, not on the comments.*

Few people tweeted the lines, and some of them are just so supportive.

"kinda miss your writing."

"been awhile since i saw your words like this."

"Bring your laptop tomorrow to Spore, and write the new note immediately please."

they say.

Ah, too bad i'm gonna be so darn busy for the next upcoming months.

Gonna let my faithful readers down for a bit. LOL.

Anyway, gonna add another line.

"What is life.. really..

without people who are always there, supporting your passion?"

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

HURAAAH!!

2010-01-03T06:06:00.004+11:00

In 2010,

i would like to feel again :)

Time to break up this numbness.

I sensed that this year is gonna be uhmahzing.

Can't wait for Your surprise.

2009, to be frank, you suck. Goodbye.

Off i go to another party,

muSHAdool.

Yes, we are indeed big time dreamers.

2009-12-31T03:31:00.006+11:00

30 Desember, 2009, 11.19 P.M.

An oath, a pact, was made between pink piggy and black piggy.

Yes yes, call us so dreamy, call us naive,

call us "they-still-dunno-how-tough-real-world-is"

But i, we, believe in the power of dreams, and prayers.

I will definitely remember today.

Like i tweeted few days ago,

"If i'm going to be someone, someday,

i believe it's all because of the great people around me."

Off i go,

the-very-excited-about-2010, muSHAdool.

Quote of the day.

2009-12-17T04:00:00.003+11:00

"Don't blame other people for running too fast,

better think why you don't run fast enough."

-muSHAdool-

Quote of the day.

2009-12-16T07:03:00.007+11:00

Tweeted this today.

"Dreams are to lovers as wine is to friends.

Carried through lifetimes, spilled now and then."

Or in its original language,

"Les rêves des amoureux sont comm’(e) le bon vin
Ils donn(ent) de la joie ou bien du chagrin."

Camille - Le festin.

And oh yeah,

i'm a sucker for french and jazz.

and google translate.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Day 3: A boy and a girl, just like i wanted.

2009-12-16T06:37:00.006+11:00

I only saw this..

Dunno what it means.

I'm still 18, so not ready for a marriage. Not even ready for a boyfriend.

But i guess..

it's always good to know my future is bright :)

and that's... day 3.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Someday, i will :)

2009-12-15T07:19:00.010+11:00

Have you ever loved a song so much you feel like posting the lyric everywhere?

So, here it is. The song of my life. Period.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm not surprised.
Not everything lasts.
I've broken my heart so many times I stopped keeping track.
Talk myself in.
I talk myself out.
I get all worked up, then I let myself down.

I tried so very hard not to lose it.
I came up with a million excuses.
I thought I thought of every possibility.

And I know someday that it'll all turn out.
You'll make me work so we can work to work it out.
And promise you, kid, that I'll give so much more than I get.
I just haven't met you yet.

I might have to wait.
I'll never give up.
I guess it's half timing,
And the other half's luck.
Wherever you are.
Whenever it's right.
You'll come out of nowhere and into my life.

And I know that we can be so amazing.
And baby your love is gonna change me.
And now I can see every possibility.

They say all's fair.
In love and war.
But I won't need to fight it.
We'll get it right and,
We'll be united.

And I know that we can be so amazing.
And being in your life is gonna change me.
And now I can see every single possibility, mmmm.

I just... haven't met you yet.

Whatta a lyric, Mr. Buble.

off i go,

muSHAdool.

Day 2: "Ur vision should fit in a size S t-shirt." - P. Pringle.

2009-12-14T04:50:00.007+11:00

Was just watching a movie,

then, an indescribable thirst and hunger came.

"Get a pen, and a paper."

"Write it down."

and that's... day 2.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Day 1 : Xmas Tree.

2009-12-14T04:09:00.006+11:00

I saw a 5 years old me..

decorating a Christmas tree,

humming the Christmas songs,

hanging the finest decoration on the tree.

Then, he came.

He helped me hanging the decoration on the tree,

He smiled.

So happy seeing his daughter excited for Christmas.

Suddenly, i looked back.

There were my friends, all of them.

Wearing a Christmas' hat and they were all so happy.

So happy because it's Christmas. As happy as i am.

They shouted, "MERRY XMAS!!"

The girls hugged me, the boys shook my hand.

Then, i saw my family.

They got me Christmas gifts. The well-wrapped gifts.

Then, they were all gone.

I was left alone, alone with him.

He said, "Sit here."

I sat on his lap, put my hand around his neck,

and hoping to hear some wonderful stories.

He asked, "What do you want for Christmas from me?"

I pretended like i have to think about it first.

I already know exactly what i want for this greatest day of the year.

Then i answered, "Just... a clearer vision. from you."

He smiled, and simply said, "you got it."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I opened my eyes.

Tears were all over. Blissful tears.

There's nothing but gratefulness and joy inside.

and that's... just day 1.

Early Merry Xmas to you all.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Oh how i hate you, dreadful nights.

2009-12-02T06:14:00.005+11:00

Vague.

Blur.

Unsure.

Skeptical.

Denial.

Hesitant.

These words make one simple line:

It still hurts.

People say, time heals.

any wounds.

Well, time didn't do a pretty good job. not to me.

But i'll be fine.

Yes, i freaking will.

Prayer(s),

i count on you.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Trip by road.

2009-11-11T23:13:00.016+11:00

Went to the "Great Ocean Road" few days ago,

and these are the awesome pics i took.

View from the top.

The famous "12 Apostle" rocks.

The not-so-famous "muSHAdool" ;p

Fish and chips OZ style and size.

SO CUTE!

The beautiful sunset above the cliff.

Lesson?

1. You might think you're big, you might think you have it all, but who are you compared to one big world?

2. God's awesome. Enough said.

Off i go,

the road-trip-lover muSHAdool.

One word: Thankful.

2009-10-28T01:54:00.006+11:00

"Thanks for your idea! I got an A in my assignment!"

"I had a dream last night. I can see you finally get your dream job!"

"Promise, we will be good friends always."

"Oh come on, from the way you write, your dream job is a perfect fit for you!"

"Come home quick, we miss you." - said gazillion people.

"When it comes to passion, it's always good to be specific."

"You'll be used by Him greatly one day. you are a blessing to us."

"One day, you'll cry because you're too happy."

"Dear me, always a pleasure talking to you."

(obviously it wasn't me who said this ;p)

Dear the great people around me,

you may not remember you once said this to me,

but it surely meant the world for me.

i thank God for you.

and

I love you.

Hope to see you soon!

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

like a "paranormal activity"

2009-10-25T00:12:00.014+11:00

I'm no horror movie fan. I get scared easily.

and i don't get the idea why people would bother to watch it and have their own trouble sleeping at night.

But today, i (kinda) watched one, because a peer pressure,

and i didn't have trouble with it.

because little that people know..

there's one thing, one feeling, that's wayyyy more scary and more frustrating than any horror movie.

it haunts me like crazy.

Holiday oh holiday..

2009-10-23T01:27:00.007+11:00

my current muse:

Cafe world. Be my neighbors.

Holiday. It makes you less cool.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Quote of the day.

2009-10-08T18:47:00.016+11:00

I posted this on my Twitter a week ago,

"Many people think they're different, but at the end, they end up being part of the crowd."

(Andy Stanley)

Being different than crowd is bloody hard.

But who says it's an impossible thing to do?

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

In awe.

2009-10-07T22:21:00.005+11:00

"Just because people disappointed you many times,
doesn't mean I will."

"Just because they come and go,

doesn't mean I will leave you."

"Just because you shouldn't rely on people,

doesn't mean you can't trust Me."

"Lean not to your own understanding and I will make your path clear."

Well-said, King.

Well.. said.

Off i go,

Fatty Queen.

Movie: the least boring teacher.

2009-10-06T21:55:00.014+11:00

Like i told my friend few days ago,

"i watch movies to learn."

and movies also seems never failed to give me new insight and valuable lesson.

This time..

the teacher is..

WHAT HAPPENS IN VEGAS!

It's not this got-drunk-and-got-married-in-vegas scene,

or this..

but it's basically a scene when the slutty ehem cougar ehem sorry! what's her name? oh cameron diaz and ashton kutcher finally wants to stay married after they realized they're in love and yada yada yada..

CC (Cougar Camy): "For so long, i've always tried to please everybody. But by not trying to please you, i think i finally become myself again."

It just struck me that that's what i, you, and most of us been doing.

We always try to please everybody.

We always think that we're not good enough.

I actually took a personality test on blogthings

and the result showed that yes, i always wanted to please my family and friends.

I don't care about other people, i only care about them.

But i suddenly realize,

it's not possible.

I am human,

you are too.

(Unless you're a frog and you can read this, it's a totally different issue.)

and human make mistakes.

we're allowed to make mistakes.

We can't please everybody. We.. just can't.

Trying so hard to please everybody is TIRING.

I've done it 18 years. Couldn't be more tiring.

So, now i'm gonna go to sleep, take a rest.

Not gonna worry about other people.

I'm not afraid to make mistakes.

because no mistakes, no learning.

Like this very cliche but yet so true statement,

Be yourself. :)

People might not like you,

but it's their loss. really.

"Don't let people to tell you who you are, you tell them!"

- Serena Van der Woodsen to Blair Waldorf.

You know you love me,

xoxo,

Gay Guy

ups

Gay Girl

ups

muSHAdool.

Quote of the day

2009-10-06T00:24:00.004+11:00

"A person starts dying,

when they stop dreaming."

Brian Williams.

Well, according to that quote, I'm pretty much very alive.

How about you? :)

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

My sweet mess.

2009-10-05T23:40:00.005+11:00

If there's one word to describe my room, my current room, that would be..

Messy.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Oh too much dramaaa!

2009-10-01T00:55:00.009+10:00

One thing for sure:

High school drama never ends.

You may not wear the uniform again,

but the drama will never stop.

You can live your life normally,

never intended to make a scene.

But, yet, those people with such a boring life, swoop their way in and made a scene.

Their life is so boring that they have to talk about their friends to make their life a bit better.

Well..

It's a good thing that we don't hang out anymore.

Coz i don't hang out with junks nor backstabber.

and i, myself, have a pretty interesting life :)

And unlike you,

i don't like to backstab my friends.

One question though..

If you keep on trash-talking your friends,

who will end up become your friends? your real friends?

Don't end up lonely, dear... That's sad. So sad.

Toodles!

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Darn you, final exam.

2009-09-22T21:13:00.005+10:00

Well, this is not a media talk. Later yah ;-)

This is... a heart talk. LOL!

I'm currently facing final exam (even though i don't feel like facing one. thank God for the very easy exam in OZ ;p)

But still.. if i don't have any final exam, let's see what i could probably doing.

1. I could go to Perth with my sister and my nephew. They're on "Lebaran" holiday.

2. my mom and dad could visit me here. And we could go shopping!! :( They knew i'm having my final exam so they decided to go to Israel. I wanna come too!!!!

3. I could go to Tulip Farm, it's spring here in Melbourne, so seeing flower blooming is.. suhweet! My cousin and my friends asked me to go but i can't :(

4. I could go have lunch with my church friends. Okay, this i can do every sunday. But, still.. worth mentioning... haha.

Hix hix. Bad.. bad timing for final exam.

Okay, enough complaining. More studying. (Yeah, right).

Off i go,

muSHAdoool

Teehee.

2009-09-21T01:06:00.007+10:00

Doesn't mean to sound too self-conscious,

but i just realized i've been writing heavy and deep stuff on my blog lately.

Dunno whether it's a good thing or not (you tell me!),

but I've decided to post and write more general things for upcoming post(s).

And by general, it means LOTS of media talk. LOL.

Wait for it! :)

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Less of self = Selfless.

2009-09-17T19:25:00.021+10:00

Me: Can i share something?

Him: Go on.

Me: Hehe, i have to admit tho, i'm pretty tired these days.

Tired of facing self-centered people.

It's like, all they can say "Didn't you see what i was doing? Didn't you read what i wrote? Didn't you this what i that. I this, i that, i those, i these."

Him: HOAAAA, i'm lucky i'm not as open as you do! and euw.. It's so junior high. Abege berat.

I don't think i can handle that kind of people! It's not like i live for read what they wrote or watch every moves they make!

Me: Yeah, once you said, "Use me more.."

this is just another little thing you have to bear, dear.

Him: Yeahh.. true. But i don't think i'll choose that path. Haha.

Me: LOL. Well, everybody has their own path. Don't worry :)

and thank you for buzzing me first, needed that :)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I know i'm tired,

No, i know i'm exhausted.

But i know i'm not doing this for me.

The One i'm doing this for, always reward His faithful servant :)

My tiredness is nothing compared to the Cross.

I have no right to complain.

If complaining makes everything better, i would definitely do it.

But, it doesn't. So, why bother?

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Pursue your passion!

2009-09-15T22:03:00.017+10:00

Her: Can i use your words? I want to make it into a poster and hang it on my wall.

I want to use it as a motivation.

Me: You undoubtedly made my day!!

Her: You'll write a good and inspiring book one day, dear. Everyone will love it.

Me: Let's just say big fat "AMEN!!!" and yeah, you'll get a free autograph from the writer, LOL!

Her:I've read your note abt "The September Issue" that we watched together and i practically just stared on my laptop and wondering, "How could she write some stuff like this?!

Me: awww, thank youu.. You didn't see it coming, eh? Because i was yawning all the time when we were watching yeah? hahaha. Yeah well, i was yawning because i was too tired, not because of i was bored fosho! ;p

Her: I know!

Her: Can you tag me in whenever you write notes?

Me: My pleasure.

Me: Mom, can i change my major? You know i have passion in writing.

Mom: You can do anything you want. Be what you're good at, and do what you're passionate for.

Her: What major are you taking? Business?

Me: *dalam hati (EUW, NO!)* "No, i'm taking Bachelor of Arts (Creative and Professional Writing)

Her: That's great! Your passion yeah?

Me: It is :)

Well, if there's one thing about passion..

It's tangible.

Everyone can see it, everyone can feel it.

This passion thing has been "bothering" me for the last few days.

I'm connecting the dots..

Movies, TV series (undoubtedly, Ugly Betty), these amazing comments from my friends, sermon, prayers, and even my own writing..

There is no coincidence that they have the same message.

They're reassuring and reaffirming my passion.

Yep, this is my passion. God has put this on my heart.

What's yours, oh thee mighty readers?

How to know what your passion is?

First, ask.

"If you don't know the meaning behind one painting, there's always someone you can go to.

The Creator." - Jeffrey Rachmat.

Ask the Creator of your life.

Then, pursue it.

It's not only happiness that you have to pursue,

but also passion.

I don't know about you,

but my greatest desire is when i meet the Mighty king,

He will look me in the eye and say,

"It was hard, wasn't it? Well done, oh good and faithful servant."

That keeps me going, i know it will be worth it.

P.S: For those who have given me so many support,

i assure you, you're investing in the right girl.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Push!

2009-09-15T21:51:00.010+10:00

Hmm.. still about movies..

this time is..

(I kinda don't like the poster,

i thought it was like another "Nim's island" or something.)

This movie is very recommended to those who love "Heroes" TV series.

It's still about few people with special abilities and they're on a mission, bala bala balaaaaa..

Chris Evans is SO HOOTTTT! No wonder he was "the fire guy" on the Fantastic Four.

Dakota Fanning.. hm.. still need comment? Of course she was good.

Well,

what i learned?

In order to run, or even fell on your knees,

you just need one push.

Push could be a good one, or a bad one.

I can't say this enough..

Your friend, your surroundings give you influence more than you know.

Once again..

Don't be too nice,

be wise.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Quotes of the day.

2009-09-12T22:57:00.011+10:00

Watched these on saturday.

"Keep your eyes open, you'll get an inspiration from everywhere." - Grace Koddington.

"Don't be too nice, you'll lose." - Grace Koddington.

If i might add from what Grace Koddington, the creative director of VOGUE US said..

"Being wise is better than (just) being nice." - muSHAdool ;p

And also, from this documentary movie, i learned something..

They, the mighty successful people had a dream when they were at my age.

17, 18, 20..

One simple thing to do if you want to be successful: Have a dream.

Do you have a dream? I have. I'm working on it.

"Don't forget those people who have supported you and brought you to this level." - Kak Yuda.

I loved one busy day.

Toldcha, i'm ready to get back in the game :)

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Hide and seek no more!

2009-09-11T22:26:00.013+10:00

I love music.

I love TV series.

I love DVDs.

Am a sucker for them.

They are my distractions, they are my best of friends.

I was just randomly searching for good songs to download from Limewire.

Then, i saw this song.

"Hide and Seek - Imogen Heap. Soundtrack of the OC."

As a fan of Josh Schwartz and his amazing TV series,

i downloaded the song right away.

where are we?
what the hell is going on?
the dust has only just begun to form
crop circles in the carpet
sinking feeling

spin me round again
and rub my eyes,
this can't be happening
when busy streets a mess with people
would stop to hold their heads heavy

hide and seek
trains and sewing machines
all those years
they were here first

oily marks appear on walls
where pleasure moments hung before the takeover,

the sweeping insensitivity of this still life..

Aside of its unusual music and lyrics,

the title itself speaks loudly to me.

This is what i've been doing lately..

Playing hide and seek.

Someone keep on seeking for me,

Someone keep on asking me to do something,

Someone keep on telling me to "Go.. run.. as fast as you used to.."

Someone keep on using every media to send the message.

Songs, musics, lyrics, TV series, 6 different people who prayed for me.

Yet i keep on hiding.

Hiding is safe.

Hiding is comfortable.

But, hiding is surprisingly tiring.

My heart is not at peace lately.

Stubbornness and sloth had gotten in the way.

I've got to be back in the game.

Playing hide and seek is only fun when you're a child.

The more you grow up,

the more you shouldn't hide.

No matter how tough and how hard life is.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

which one are you?

2009-09-07T01:08:00.006+10:00

"I have dreams.. Why can't i get all of them like.. now?"

"Why they can have it all easily? While i have to wait.. and wait.."

"What if i can't?"

"What do i have to do when problems arise?"

"What?"

"When?"

"How?"

"Where?"

"Why?"

In a blink of an eye, suddenly drained.

Opened up my daily reading,

"You don't have to know about tomorrow - that makes you happy.

You don't have to know about yesterday - that makes you happy.

You don't have to know how to do everything,

all you need to do is know the One who knows.

Trying to figure things out will only wear you out."

- Joyce Meyer.

Looked up the title of that daily reading..

"Are you trusting or are you worrying?"

I decided to choose the first one.

Life is meant to be nothing but enjoyed.

Too short for worrying.

Which one are you?

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

What i love from birthdays... THE GIFTS! :)

2009-08-27T02:27:00.019+10:00

"You have great friends."

They say.

The gifts!

Not the maker nor the creator. Yet, the poser.

"You look good," said him.

My almost-10-years bestie :)

They rocked my high school! and.. until college of course. :)

Peeps who rocked my night!

"I'm so blessed knowing you for about one year and more! I like to see your friendliness and your passion in reaching your goals!

I can see that God is working in your life. Continue your walk with Him!

Be wise, be cool, be careful, be nice, be humble, be awesome, BE VENISHA TJIE! Happy birthday."

Mrs. Spare.

"Thanks for being my best friend for the last 10 years. I've been looking for a good friend for 17 years, and no one can compared to you. Thanks for not being such a hypocrite, thanks for never stabbing my back, you always share everything with me. Including fat. Haha.

Once again, thanks for the friendship. Happy birthday.

A friend is the one who walks in when others walk out."

Mrs. Bitchy. hihi.

I do.

But then again, likes attract likes :)

Give, then you'll be given.

Invest everything, every time, every day, in your loved ones,

they'll make your birthday unforgettable :)

I am one lucky 18 years old girl.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Oh.. finally.

2009-08-25T23:16:00.015+10:00

I know i should post the best birthday wishes or the most touching ones, or even the gross ones ;p

But the more i grow up,

The more i learn, to NOT make everything about me.

I know i can, and yeah i know i want to. But nope. I'm not gonna.

These came from all the people around me.

They surely made me smile and definitely made my birthday :)

They're irrelevant, but that's the point :)

"I couldn't have done it without God on my side. Finally, i can release forgiveness to those hypocrites family. I'm now stronger and yet i know it's not because of my strength!"

"I didn't do anything, he did. He opened his heart. He stopped smoking. Finally, he can feel the joy from above."

"Can you keep a secret? I'm about to become a leader!"

"What time do you go offline? I want to share something with you!"

Highlight of the day:

"I got the best gift(s) from God on my bday, i hope you will too.

Happy birthday, Sha."

Came from a lady who have been waiting for almost 10 years to get pregnant.

She finally is. On her birthday. A twin.

Making everything about yourself, even though it's your birthday, is so last year.

It's time to make it about others.

Selfish is out, selfless is in.

P.S: it's amazing seeing how self-centered people can make everything about them.

Their friend is having a birthday, but the subject of the conversation is no different. Always started with an "I."

Hey, relationship works two ways! Oh wait, doesn't matter anyway ;p

Anyhoo,

200++ wall posts,

countless tweets (too lazy to count ;p), smses, email, instant messages and buzzes on MSN.

I am one lucky 18 years old girl. I love you and i thank you, my family and friends.

And.. i miss you.

Off i go,

the finally legal in OZ, muSHAdool.

Daily bread.

2009-08-04T01:31:00.007+10:00

"If the canvas struggled under the artist's paint brush,

the painting would never get finished.

The canvas have to be perfectly still, totally submitted to the artist's wisdom and creativity.

Struggling won't change you - neither will frustration or worry." - Joyce Meyer, New Day New You (4th August)

To sum it up,

Surrender more,

worry less.

Enjoy life EVEN MORE.

your colourful life :)

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Max Brenner Cafe, 10 p.m, QV, Melbourne.

2009-08-02T00:30:00.012+10:00

The wind blew calmly,

the weather was so nice,

and the city was so amazingly alive even though it's night already.

(it's OZ for crying out loud, the stores close at 5 P.M. ;p)

We were there, just hanging out.

the dark chocolate,

the Italian milk chocolate,

and the American milk chocolate.

Some secrets were spilled,

dark secrets.

Some privacy were revealed,

the very private ones.

Some crazy imagination were expressed,

the ones we really wanted.

"We did that. At our first month. I know i was wrong."

"I still do that, please don't tell anybody. It's between us only."

"When you first came to Melbourne, i told her, "Hey her english is pretty good!

But guess what, she disagreed with me. I guess she was just envious with you."

"High school was the best, huh?"

"I've always wanted to have that kind of life."

Well..

Good conversation, good friends, good chocolate and good weather,

are the BEST combination.

Everyone has their own reasons, their own stories, their own past.

Listen more,

talk less.

Open more,

Judge less.

That's the key to manage a good relationship :)

"Come on, tell us. We're already like brothers and sister."

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

It's no Oscars but meant a lot :)

2009-07-28T00:31:00.009+10:00

Well well well.. Look what i got! Got this award from my girl, Winno my fashion bitch! :)

Award Meaning:
Tutorit Friendship is an award that we give for blog that you think really inspire you and really friendly

Homework to Special Friends :

1. Make a posting about this award
2. Mention who give you this award
3. Gift this award to your best friends or people who inspire you.
4. go to their blog and tell them you have award for them.
5. Do the same thing like who gave you this award.
6. copy and paste from "Begin Copy" until "End Copy" at your own blog

SOOOO now it's my chance to pass along this award toooo my very own fellas' blog that inspire me a lot in many ways :)

This award goes toooooo *DRUM ROLL, PLEASE!!*

Winno Prasetyo herself.

Henry Gerson

Larasati Silalahi

Irene Renata

You can copy paste this to your blog as well :)

orr give the award back to me. Feel free to do so! LOL.

Off i go,

muSHAdool

Lesson of the day.

2009-07-28T00:08:00.005+10:00

Oh thee faithful readers,

If there's one thing i learned today..

Look for a friend who keeps saying,

"Thanks for listening :) It's really nice talking to you!"

even though you are close enough with them,

when chitty chatty is not really necessary.

but they still keep saying that.

To hell with those who take you for granted,

look for those who treasure you! :)

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Questions.. and answers.

2009-07-25T01:24:00.010+10:00

Me and my folks were just hanging out, and suddenly these questions arise.

Q: Since when you become one?

A: Since i was born.

Q: Do you think good people go to heaven?

Even though let's say they're an... atheist?

A: For me, it's not about being good or bad. But it's about WHO do you believe in.

Q: Why do you believe He exists?

A: He was there when nobody was. My personal experience told me.

Q: But, somehow i don't believe He's the one who created the universe.

A: Well, you wear a watch yeah?

Q: Uh huh.

A: You believe someone created that watch?

Q: Yeah. Then?

A: Just because you didn't see or meet the creator of the watch,

doesn't mean he doesn't exist, eh?

Q: But, why can't i feel Him?

A: you have no personal relationship.

Q: What if i want to?

A: Find a perfect "field", where you can grow.

Faith is like a seed, only in perfect "field" it can grow.

Q: Can i go with you sometimes?

A: Sure.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

During your journey,

there will be time when your faith is being asked.

Don't blame the people who asked,

just hush them with the right answer.

I never declare myself religious, (haha heck no)

but i do love thiskindofsomewhatreligious conversation,

and i do love spreading the truth with the ones i love.

If I'm growing,

I'm taking my folks with me. :)

"You can get people to listen,

if you can get their heart first." - Jose Carol

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Math? Say what??

2009-07-14T21:31:00.009+10:00

Today, my bit*h asked me for a help.

She was given this project by her teacher,

which she basically has to make a poem..

about MATH and NATION.

As a math-hater i am, my first respond was:

WTH?????

Haha. Couldn't think of a better respond.

Well, she already did the first lines.

It sounded like this,

Do we learn math to add the dead' sum?

Subtract the weak ones,

count cash for great ones?

Shall we multiply or divide the nation?

Break down like fractions,

Send our sons away to die?

At first i was like, whoaaaaa too many language i don't understand!

Math language is not a human language! haha.

But i thought it was already good.

So as a media and communication student i am,

or a girl who updates her blog pretty often (yes, i do realize this. haha)

I told her..

"There's too many information you put in one stanza. (the paragraph in poem, just googled it haha). If there's too much info already, you can't write anything else.

Break it down.

Like for example, you can talk about "multiply" or "subtract" first.

"Subtract the money for those who in need,

not for those who can only sit in government seats and do nothing."

"Should the nation multiply the wars and multiply those who died?

Multiply the blood?

Multiply the tears shed?

Multiply the family who worried sick over night and day,

waiting for their love ones to come home?"

Long story short,

She used this for her poem :)

Hm, moral of the day..

Everybody must have their "thing."

No! i don't mean in erotic kind of way.

I mean,

there's always something that you really good at.

Singing? Dancing? Taking good photos? Teaching? Writing? or even just.. Smiling?

Whatever it is,

whatever your "thing" is,

use it for good.

Be a blessing.

For those who in need.

Coz also last time i checked,

self-centered people don't have too many friends.

Self-less people do. =)

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

my God.. get over it already! or at least get new cover!

2009-07-06T23:21:00.026+10:00

Time for another media talk!

Is it just me or these news are way too much?

1. Michael Jackson's news.

I know he's dead and all, he's a legend, king of pop, such and such.

It was ok at first. World is mourning, i know.

But..

I've had enough seeing his pics. It's almost 2 weeks now.

Still all over the news, internet, magazine cover(ssssssssssssssss).

Sssstt, I once had nightmare because of his gazilion scary pics. ;p

Err.. i also heard there's like hundreds of people who killed themselves because their "idol" passed away.

Man, what a stupid and by stupid i mean VERY STUPID way to end your precious life!

However, it's still such a loss.

Rest in peace, Mr Jacko. Wacko Jacko ;p

You'll be remembered always. Not by me, though. I still need sleep. haha.

2. Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart's on-and-off love story.

Two words: BITE me!

3. Brad Pitt's and Angelina Jolie's (un)happy (not)marriage life.

Well, Mr Pitt..

Two advices for you and your family:

1. Take off your shirt more often in public.

2. Leave the bitch and go back to Jen Aniston.

Problem solved.

4. Dramas, conflicts, fashionable life of the Beckhams.

Well, this one is still ok. Coz me likey them ;p

Choose, David. It's Becks or Beckinsale!

or Sasha!

haha.

Extra credits for you if you can find another story besides these 4 on these covers below!

If you found Lindsay Lohan, still not thorough enough.

Coz she's a media-whore (with a fake tan! duh.)

I think "Famous" needs new cover. Dontcha think?

But i still love that magz wholheartedly though! The best gossip source ever ;p

Haha, well.. this is fun. Feel free to drop comments. Teehee.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Totally random post: my bad boys.

2009-07-05T01:21:00.011+10:00

Do you, as a person, have like.. certain issue you always struggle with?

I have.

It's about my personality.

or can i say.. my personalities.

I am naturally a sanguine melancholic.

I may (appear) to be happy while actually i have a lot in my mind going on,

and another "I-don't-act-what-i-feel" stuff.

My personality is actually kinda interesting.

It's very opposite to each other.

Like black is opposite to white,

Like day is opposite to night.

I once read in personality book whatsoever and found out that the combination of my personalities are the most complicated one ;p

It may sound weird but they are best friends. They work well with each other.

They make each other better coz one's weakness is one's strength, and vice versa.

However, it takes some level of maturity to balance my personalities. You think? :p

Back then, when i was in junior high, you'd see me laughing my ass off at school with my friends,

but once i finally all by myself in my room, i'd cry. Without no reason.

Yeah, i was that "weird."

Thank God i'm not that "extreme" anymore. Kinda scary, huh?

But, actually..

These two personalities i have, helped me a lot in finding true friends.

Wanna know why?

Because, true friends.. don't only share laughter, but also tears.

True friends can understand why i could be so "wild"

but i also could be so "deep" in thinking.

True friends don't judge.

Mockery is our enemy.

They see beyond the "cover"

That's why, my love language is quality time.

By spending time, i can see whether my friends are true friends or not.

Well,

i gotta say.

Befriending with my sanguine side is very easy.

It's very friendly and very outgoing.

It's easy to connect with this side of me.

But i come with another side,

This other side of me includes deep thinking, critical thoughts, life subject-related issue, which not so many people can connect with.

That's why, it's easy for me to find who are my true friends.

Let's just see who can connect with my two bad boys. Both of them.

Not just one, both.

Even though i'm struggling with these bad boys everyday,

but i'm so grateful having them in my life.

They complete each other.

They make me see the world and its madness through two different point of views.

Which not so many people do. :)

Ha ha. This is so random.

My melancholic and love-to-writing-instead-of-talking side of me is talking ;p

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Speaking LOUDLY to myself!

2009-07-03T00:44:00.007+10:00

What's with the traffic jam?

What's with the concerning air pollution?

What's with the sucky public transportation?

What's with the over-capacity population?

Say hello to Jakarta.

What's with the uncertain weather?

What's with the individualism?

What's with the undercover racism?

What's with the expensive living cost?

Say hello to Melbourne.

What's with the global recession?

What's with the never-ending poverty and hunger?

What's with the people who kill themselves just because their idol just passed away?

What's with the virulent contagious disease?

Say hello to the World.

Nowhere is perfect.

Nowhere is secure.

I'm still safe,

i still can breathe easily,

i still have enough shelter, food, clothes.

I have no reason not to be grateful.

so should you.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Agreed!

2009-07-03T00:41:00.001+10:00

"Do not look back and ask why, but look forward and ask why not." - NN

random thoughts :)

2009-07-02T00:41:00.012+10:00

Well, been awhile since i updated my blog. Miss writing so much. hehe.

So here we go!

Lots of updates, thoughts, events i want to write :) Bear with me!

1. I got a job-offer, got accepted, and... quit after 2 days of training haha.

Turned out it's one sucky job ;p Enough said.

Moral lesson: i shouldn't rush, just enjoy my teenage moment. When he says, "not yet." then... not yet.

2. I didn't have any relationship with any boys (nor girls haha) back in high-school, and yet.. i didn't miss a thing.

I had this conversation with my housemate, and i was asking him whether he already had been in relationship (and how many ;p), and he told me a complete story of his love life,

he went on and on, til finally i said this,

"You know what, i've never been in relationship before,

i hung out with bunch of guys back in high school, from different groups,

and we had LOTS OF FUN, we were pure friends.

the best part is.. we are still friends 'til now,

because we were never involved in some crappy high-school relationship thingy and i didn't have to deal with what-so-called my "ex" haha.

I never had a relationship before, yet i didn't miss a thing :)"

and.. he simply nodded his head, and agreed with me. I know one day, my friends will too.

Lucky i have my older brothers and sisters who watch over me back then (and 'til now).

For me, relationship is meant for 2 "whole" people, who are ready for marriage,

and.. i'm still 17, my age speaks very loud about my readiness for marriage. Ha ha.

3. I miss having a community.

I miss having a DATE.

4. Melbourne is boring.

At first, i thought Melbourne, or Australia is so much fun, where everything goes very fast, but nyeh.. turns out, it's very slow. Ausi's pace is very slow.

Yes, Melbourne is very artsy (i'll post the pic later) and it's a quite-developed city,

but plain.. boring. It's good for holiday, not for 3 years (or more) living.

For NYC-minded person like me, Melb is boring. NYAHAHAH. *gaya lo, til!*

5. Blackberry oh blackberry.

I know this phenomenon is only so crazy in Indo (especially)

i barely found local people in Oz using BB, they use iPhone. Cooler actually.

but seriously, this phenomenon is getting crazier and crazier!!!!

My mom is now on BB too. Yes, my "gaptek" mom.

She got it from my "even gaptek-er" dad.

i really shouldn't underestimate my parents LOL.

Gosh, I even haven't got mine.

6. Grown-up stuff is confusing.

I also had this conversation with my friend about life after i graduated from uni.

Pretty much i have to do these,

-I have to apply for Ausi's permanent resident (PR).

It costs me $5000 dollars, and if i don't get it, i have to apply for the second chance, for another $5000 dollars, or NOT.

-I have to apply for a job and get it in within a year in Ausi. or NOT.

-Probably my dad will send me to the country i hate the most, and ironically where my grandparents were originally from, China. Haha. or NOT.

-Continue for master degree? or NOT.

What's confusing is (and what i meant by "or not.")

i don't want to work for a long term in this boring city, and yet i don't want to go back to Indo right after i graduated, coz there's no doubt Indo's salary for fresh-graduate people is.... not good.

So, the good thing to do is to work here for about 1/2 years first then i go back to Indo,

again.. or not.

Well.. you see, i'm pretty much a thinker,

i think about stuff, wayyyyyy too far ahead.

i worry about stuff, wayyyyyy too much.

That's my illness.

I have to relax! Chill! It's only entering my 5th months here, and i still have 2 years to go. i shouldn't have worried this much.

Many things, wonderful things, could happen, eh?

Like he said, "be a warrior, not a worrier, my dear!"

I really should.

Okay enough thoughts ehem craps. thanks for reading.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Describe yourself!

2009-06-20T02:02:00.004+10:00

Peepz,

If you were once asked to describe yourself in only one word, what would it be?

For me,

I'd answer,

"Hai, my name is Venisha Tjie or people usually call me Sasha (or call me whatever you want, different group, different nickname for me -_-)

and i am.. crazy."

That would describe me well.

How about you? Give some respond! :)

Special love letter to my King.

2009-06-18T00:15:00.012+10:00

Hey You,

Your hug, touches my very soul. It’s warmer than the sunshine.

Your kiss, changes my tears into smile and laughter.

Your sound, it's very addictive. I'd rather die if i can't hear those sweet voices.

Your presence, makes me wanna dance. Dance with endless joy.

The way you said “I love you, My dearest queen.” is.. indescribable. Too magical to be true.

Your love, nobody can compete with it.

Hey You,

You have stolen something important from me. My heart.

You don't have to give it back, it's all Yours now.

Hey You,

Just wanna promise you one thing..

I will never let You go,

Coz You are the reason I breathe.

My morning, my afternoon and my night.

You are my everything.

With lots of love,

Your very own fatty Queen.

From my point of view..

2009-06-09T20:20:00.031+10:00

I read magazines very often.

I surf on gossip websites every single day (blame the holiday)

I'm a media and communication student,

medias are my daily needs..

and in my opinion...

The most overrated people ever

are... *drum roll please!!*

1. Lindsay Lohan (and Samantha Ronson)

Drug addiction, AWFULLY skinny body,

broke, high level of insecurity, their lesbian love life, are just.. pathetic.

2. Robert Pattinson.

I know he's hot and all (err.. he looks kinda gay in this pic below),

but seeing all of his pics and stories on every gossip magazines and websites are just.. boooooring!

Seriously? 5 awards on MTV movie awards 2009?

Awarded for what?

The fact that he likes to go to stripper club, and he stinks?

Uh-oh, what an "obviously interesting" achievements!

3. Heidi and Spencer

Errr, who are they once again?

What made them famous?

Other than their fake marriage(s), i can't remember anything else.

4. Paris Hilton

What's so good about a walking barbie? We might just go to toys R us!

5. Vanessa Hudgens.

Well this one is not on my "the most overrated people" list,

but it's on "I simply don't like her" list. She's on the top.

Teenage idol = nude photos leaked on Internet. That's not cool.

Give us more! more more!

Just can't get enough of em even though their news are also like.. everywhere.

0. Chace Crawford

He's on my zero number, higher than one ;p

Why? He's SUPER hot. Not just hot, SUPER.

1. David Beckham and Victoria Beckham

They're hot. and fashionable. Their accent are enviable.

and oh, Vic's 100 colorful Hermes birkin bags collection blew my eyes away.

2. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie (and their marriage life drama)

What's not so good about "the sexiest man alive" and the "sexiest home-wrecker alive" marriage life drama?

Btw, i don't like Angelina Jolie, she's a bitch, but Mr Pitt is MEGA hot.

3. Nicole Richie

Thank God she's not a best pal with the walking Barbie anymore. She's wayyy better!

4. Lady GaGa

Hail to the queen!!!! Queen of music and fashion.

5. Zac Efron.

This is so not me posting about the every teenage girl's idol, but yeah.. He's hot.

He can sing, romantic dance, basketball-dance, rain dance, rooftop dance, cafetaria dance, stage dance,

That's what every girls want!

XOXO,

muSHAdool.

YEAH!!!

2009-06-08T01:46:00.006+10:00

I did it.

I've gone through the process. The bloody process i might say.

All the pain from the past,

the bad memories,

the wounds,

are gone!!

The renovation of "my castle" has finished. I'm entering a whole new level.

But still a long way to go..

I have to fill "my castle" with luxurious and beautiful furniture.

and that's... wisdom :)

I'm back in the game! My MSN is now blinking here and there, after almost 2 weeks having no one buzzed me haha. Somehow missing the crowds.

Give me more.

more. more. and more.

Fill me more.

more. more. and more.

Empty me more.

more. more and more.

I'm ready to fly, soaring high, til finally i see You :)

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

I'm bored and have no mood to write.

2009-06-04T21:09:00.018+10:00

Some random pics i took lately.

Me and my housemates have this weekly thing. Wine/beer day. Hihi.

Yep, that red "thing" is a bunch of chili. haha.

It doesn't taste that "hot", in fact it tastes good!

Come to melbourne and i'll let you try!

This one.. is charcoal chicken. Seriously, i'm drooling.

Look at the size of the chicken!

This one is steak from Pancake Parlour.

Yeah basically they mix pancake with every kind of dishes,

so i chose steak and my birthday girl chose that ice cream, choco, and strawberry thing.

Oh my, my keyboard is all wet because I'm drooling! again!

Sushi!!!!

I used this pic in one of my design assignments.

On the subject "good use of colour" haha.

All of these... are outfit for winter! The only thing missing is snow.

Huhu. I wish i'm in New York (already ;p)

My supah dupah messy desk with my fav TV show going on, FRIENDS!!

I'm a media and communication student. Enough said.

and... i love pink, and books.

Huaaaaaaah, i can't hardly wait until my girls are finally here.

Ohhh how i miss hanging out wif bunch of girls (who speak the same 'mother' language ;p)

Thank you for reading. Sorry for wasting your precious time. LOL.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Me wanna!!!!

2009-06-01T15:21:00.008+10:00

Bustier dress, Burberry Prorsum, $2,795

Jacques Torres Tuxedo Peeps, $5 for a pack of five,

Mulberry Ice Cream clear tote, $175, -- How cute is this oneeee!!!!

Tsesay Sweater $295

source: vogue.com, elle.com, harpersbazaar.com

These are just too.. cute. Me wanna. Hix.

*sobbing in despair*

Some thoughts on saturday night. :)

2009-05-31T00:26:00.013+10:00

Human is social.

It doesn't take a genius to know that we need other people.

We need to depend on other people.

In some case, we need people to make us.... happy.

Content.

Full.

Secure.

Am i right? O yea.. That's what world tells us.

Actually,

We don't need other people to determine our feelings.

We can be happy just simply because we want to.

We can laugh,

cry,

jump,

smile,

just simply because we want to.

However, it takes a quite high level of maturity to do so.

Children? They can't live without people, they need people to feed them, to give them comfort, to give them happiness..

But we're as an adult? Or ehem teenagers ;p,

We shouldn't depend on someone as much as we did when we were only a little child, should we?

Yes, we are a social human being,

but "independent" is also in our blood. We just gotta train ourselves to be so.

That is why, i am training myself, to not depend on people, especially my feelings.

Because if i do, oh man... it sucks.

When i want to feel happy,

I need to talk to my friends to make me feel so.

When i want to feel secure,

I need words of affirmation from my surroundings.

When some movies made me sad,

I need to call someone to make me feel better.

Can you imagine.... how annoying that is?

Flash news, there's A LOTTTTTT of people out there doing that.

Plus, sometimes it seems I'm the right person for them to call (or to buzz in msn). Haha.

No problemo, ehem actually sometimes it is. LOL.

Being alone (not lonely fo sho) is not such a problem for me.

I still have books, movies, magazines!!!, Internet (duh) to keep me busy.

BUT! the interesting part is...

People actually can't stand that.

I just realized this interesting fact..

I don't blame them, really.

But, it's just funny seeing them.. saying all these.

"Why don't you with him?"

"Cieeeeee Sashaaaaaaa, why you're asking whether he's home already or not??"

"Wuoooo Sasha said he's hot! Sasha has a crush on him! woohooooo!"

"Ck.. ck.. ck.. Congratulation, Betty and Henry. *looking at winda :P* (err you gotta watch Ugly Betty to understand :P)"

Haha i found it's very funny, indeed. I never found it annoying.

But, just wanna let you know..

There's a reason why i don't "love" or "like" or "having a deep crush" that easy..

My heart is not mine anymore, it is Someone's already.

and until He finally say "yes" and let another guy to come inside, i will guard this heart with all my diligence :) Deal with that.

Telling ya, it's a hard work. It is.

But, it's always better to prevent, than to heal.

It's gonna be REALLY painful to let someone go because he or she is not the right one.

It's not my season yet..

I'm only friggin' seventeen years old for crying out loud.

Ah, i forgot.

That's what other seventeen girls (and boys) do, freaking out about relationship. LOL.

Okay, this post is totally random. Haha. It's just now the "mockers" are living in the same roof with me, that's why i was inspired to write this. Guess i had it enough, LOL-ness.

HOKAAAAAAYY, gotta go to bed. Morning service tmrw. Love ya peeps!!!

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

This is.... how piggies a.k.a weirdos talk.

2009-05-27T23:36:00.005+10:00

Finally the piggies reunited..

If there's anyone have any idea what we're talking about, please, come to me and let me give your prize. A million dollar! haha.

If you actually understand what this is about, well WELCOME TO THE CLUB!

Club of piggies weirdos. haha.

Missing the piggies,

muSHAdool a.k.a pink piggy.

i can't thank God enough for them.

2009-05-24T01:38:00.008+10:00

When you're not really in the mood of doing anything..

When you're not into some shitty chitty chatty with some random people..

When you'd rather stay at home than going for parties. (or free food. hehe.)

When socializing is the last thing you wanna do..

When you're just... so dry.

When, your 'house' or.. your heart is being renovated.

When it's being renovated,

parts of you have to be torn into pieces..

parts of you have to feel nothing but pain..

Sometimes to find the true gold, you have to burn it into the wild fire. Then, you can see whether it's true gold or not.

It hurts. I'd rather feel physically hurts than to 'heart-ly' hurts.

But it's for your own good. Because after that your 'house' will be very beautiful.

The old house will be nowhere to found,

but the good, no, better, and also new, will be so shiny and it's impossible to ignore.

That's what my house's owner told me :)

When you're facing this phase,

It's always nice having someone to talk to.

Being there.. Quietly listening.. Giving supports to keep running and not to give up..

It's just so nice to know,

they are there not only when i'm strong and full..

but they are also there when i'm weak and empty..

They are not like other people,

who just came in, stole my energy, stole my attention,

and then left.

They came in,

they stole a bit of my energy,

but they stay.

and then they're doing the same thing to me. Like i did to them.

That's what true friends do.

Thank you..

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

I ain't hypocrite!

2009-05-20T23:38:00.003+10:00

"Don't force people to read the holy book,

Let them read through you!"

-JR (2004)

if i could shout.

2009-05-20T01:42:00.004+10:00

This heart is screaming..

''I miss you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!''

Please, tell me. 15 Dec 2009 is not that long...

My mood booster.

2009-05-16T21:20:00.005+10:00

I used to write this on my mirror.

Successfully brighten up my days.

My gloomy days.

It still is.

"If you faint in the day of adversity, your strength is small."

or in what my pink book wrote, (which i just bought yesterday hihi)

"If you give up when trouble comes, it shows that you have very little strength."

Proverbs 24:10

It's here!!

2009-05-07T00:50:00.009+10:00

A very big fat thanks for Mr Joe Sentoso for sending this to me!

and ehem, someone who forgot to scan it for me, shame on you! Haha love ya babe!

Here it is, my first article i wrote it here, in Melbourne.

Nyeah, well, if you don't go to that certain place on every Sunday, located at the center of Jakarta, you may not see this article sei..

Clicking on it might help :)

Well, after all the buzzing in facebook, msn, twitter, I'm still open for comments! :)

Now i miss my TAG-ers.

Great.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Your reaction shows how much you care.

2009-05-06T00:14:00.010+10:00

Let's see..

I failed.

Yes, i did.

Big fat bummer, i know. LoL.

Well, i was at my lowest point, i can't even think clearly.

Inside my head, 'what if i don't pass this subject? What if my parents know about this? What if i can't go home because of this? what if.. what if.. and what if....'

I failed, and i fell.

I was looking for someone who could help me to stand up again.

Yes, i found ones.

Thanks to my housemate, my senior, the nadyas, my twin.

'I failed once too. That made me more diligent than ever, and so will you!'

'Yes, i even failed twice on that subject. But, i passed. So will you!'

'Oh dear, sorry to hear that, but you're ok though? I believe you will pass on that subject, babe. Don't worry. So, now, quick! Work on your another assignment!'

'Come on, you can do it.'

Furthermore, (shit, i wrote too many essays)

The highlight of my day,

it came from my twin, or let's say the guy version of me.

Me: Have u ever failed on something?

Him: Yes, sha. Why?

Me: I failed. I was crushed! Sucks!

Him: Hahahahaha. Well sha, people like us, ultimately you, took something from the failure and make something out of it. Have you watched meet the robinsons?

Me: Nah. why?

Him: Yeah, there was a quote ''You learn so much if you fail, but you do learn when you succeed, but only a bit. So, the thing is, keeps failing! ahahahaha'

Me: ahahaha O.M.G. Seriously, i love you. Dearly. You made my day!!

They all did.

They made my day.

Thank you.

Really.

and hey You, yes, i know why i failed.

Because, i know sometimes i need to step back in order to jump higher.

or soar higher.

for You :)

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Dreaming out loud!

2009-05-04T00:46:00.010+10:00

I want to go to NYC.

I want to have my own magazine.

I want to have my own apartment, fully furnished.

I want to see that proud smile in my parents face.

I want to see my kids become so freakin successful.

I want to take my parents, my sisters, or my brother to go somewhere they want to go, using my own money.

Dreams oh dreams.

Should i slap myself and ask myself to stop dreaming?

Because you know, life is not THAT easy.

Well, of course i wont.

Yes, life is not THAT easy.

But, that's how life works.

Not always easy.

Tough and rough sometimes.

Full of surprises.

Dreaming is like when you walking upstairs..

You want to reach that place where you want to be..

When you're climbing the stairs,

You may not know how many staircases left you have to climb..

You may get tired.

You may get sick.

You may want to give up.

but what if you give up, when it's only one staircase left?

What if i give up, when I'm about to reach my dream?

That.... sucks.

Intermezzo: When i was writing this, there's this sound keep shouting in my ears. I swear, my ears are suddenly hot.

'you're not dreaming big enough,' that voice said.

Oh well...

Here it is. You can laugh.

The crazy version of my dreams.

1. Yes, i'll go to NYC, but it will be an annual thing. I will go back and forth for work thing. The company or can i say, the magazine i will work with, will pay the flight and all the thingy.

2. My magazine will influence so many girls and change their perspectives.

3. I'll use the best interior designer to do his/her magic for my apartment. Maybe, the best one in town.

4. Yes, my parents will be proud, but not just that, everyone will also come to them and tell them 'you must be proud with your daughter, she's amazing :)'

5. My kids will influence the nation, maybe one of them is the next president. He He.

6. I'll take my fam, fly around the world. Well, for my parents, it will be their second time.

7. I want to make every people i know, proudly telling their friends when they see me hm.. anywhere i end up :P 'you know? That girl is my friend.'

Yes yes yes, mock me. Put me on your must-mock list (LOL)

I don't care.

I will keep on dreaming. In my dictionary, imagination is stronger than facts, odds, even statistics.

Oh yes they are.

It's not about what you can see, it's all about what you CAN'T see.

My dreams are intangible, but I'm sure one day i can touch it. and feel it.

Feels familiar? That's because America Ferrera is film-ing my dreams, it's on Ugly Betty TV show. Tee hee.

Nyah, alright, Ugly Betty inspired me. Everyone can tell :P

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Back in the game!

2009-05-02T15:11:00.007+10:00

Room 1:

Me: Hey, where have you been?

Her: Nowhere, here and there.. You know me, the geeky who doesn't like to get online too often.

Me: Haha.

Her: I need to talk to you.

Me: Shoot!

Room 2:

*Buzz*

Him, my what-so-called-cousin: Hey, so i was with this girl...

Me: (Listening patiently and yes he didn't even say a proper introduction. LOL.)

Room 3:

Him, who lives next room: Whatcha doin?

Me: Nothing. Just listening to my kiddos. What's up?

Him: Ha ha. Why seems like everyone telling you everything?

Me: I don't know, they just can't stand not to talk to me about everything, nor telling me their secret. LOL.

Him: I know..

Me: LOL. How could you know that?

Him: I do that too.

Me: Hahahahaha.

Room 4:

Him, who also lives next room: (talking about my other housemate) why doesn't she move just now!

Me: hey chill! Don't be mean.

Him: Hey, i'm good with someone who is good to me, and i'll be mean to those who annoy me!

Me: Haha.. Fair enough.. Then what about me? You'll be harsh to me also??

Him: Nahh.. you're my momma.

Me: Haha that's sweet. (I kind of fringed because somehow I've known him for 2 months only haha)

Room 5 and room 6:

Them: Whatcha doing?

Me: Nothing. Just listening.

Them: Oh.. Hmm we didn't do well on our last exam :( It's so freakin hard, bla bla bla bla

Me: (Yes, i'm listening again.)

I stayed up late until 4 am last night at nadya's house, listening to them.

My twitter status: ''I stay up late for a reason. To be there for them :) but oh well, they kind of forgot of the time difference...''

----------------------------------------------------------

This morning.

Had a small birthday party at my house just then, had a great time, we eat, drink (yes, finally), and chitty chatty.

Him, again, who lives next door: Hey, sexy momma. Where hv u been last night?

Me: Slept over at my friend's house. What's up?

Him: Haha nothing. Anyway, you're younger than me right?

Me: Yes.. why?

Him: But why do you have this kind of.... something, i don't know what it is, that makes you look older, i mean.. like a mom figure or something. haha.

Me: haha, welcome to the club kiddo!

Yesssss i have more and more kiddos here! All older than me (and sometimes i need their ID to ehem, buy something. haha.)

IMHO (In My Humble Opinion), you've learned the lesson well, and i'm talking about life lesson, when you are able to share it to other people, and be a blessing for those in need. A 'mom' nickname is a bonus, though. I take that as a compliment, and yes, i'm only 17. Ha ha.

So here i am!

BACK IN THE GAME!

Ready to bless. Yes, i am.

Are you? :)

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Weird!

2009-04-30T01:22:00.006+10:00

Him: Can i go to sleep now?

Me: Fo sho. Why need my permission? Like I'm some kind of your mother or something, ah yeah i forgot. I am yeah? haha.

Him: Nahh, you're my best friend ;)

Me: Ck ck ck... Can't believe i had crush on you. Lucky I'm not anymore!

Him: I know. Every girls back then did.

Me: Haha shit that's true.

Ah yeah, yellowwww everybody. I'm back.

Better, bolder, boisterous than ever.

Gee, it's only been a week but feels like ages i haven't updated my blog, nor my twitter.

Isn't it twitterverse? Kekeke. Follow me on @sashatjie btw if you havent :)

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

sorry :)

2009-04-25T21:09:00.000+10:00

I'll be hard to reach. Sorry.

How could i forget?

2009-04-23T01:11:00.006+10:00

Ah.

I remember that day.

The day He said,

Confession:

I still ask Him, 'why should i?' until today..

I guess there's this one thing more important than faith,

Obedience.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

I'm not anymore ;)

2009-04-22T00:29:00.007+10:00

*Someone knocked on my door*

Him: Hello, Sasha.

Me: Yes?

Him: Can i go in?

Me: What's your name?

Him: My name is Bitterness. My friend just came by, his name is Facts.

Me: Oh sorry, you can't.

My room is already full, it's full of Peace.

About your friend, yes he came by, he distracted me for awhile, so i asked him to leave.

Instead, i invited one of my best friend.

Her name is Imagination.

She is greater than your friend, she works beyond Facts.

Sorry, Bitterness. You have to leave.

There is no room for you.

Him: Alright, i'll just knock on someone else's door. It might surprise you how many people who actually opened their door and let me in. MUAHAHHA.

-He left-

Hey,

Don't let him in.

Even though you already did,

Kick him out. No use keeping him.

Off i go

muSHAdool.

2nd!

2009-04-20T00:52:00.007+10:00

My essay: Zero.

Polyvore assignment: 3

Seriously, this thing more interesting. Haha.

Ok, i should get down to my assignment.

My first Polyvore assignment hahaha

2009-04-19T22:54:00.004+10:00

Supposedly, i need to finish my assignment.

But, oh well...

Let's just say this is my assignment.

Please tell me this is the one that due 2 days from now!!

and not my 1000 words of essay :(

Off i go,

Lazy-to-write-an-essay muSHAdool

Will you?

2009-04-18T01:26:00.008+10:00

''If i lay here, if i just lay here.

Would u lay with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told,

Before we gets too old.

I don't quite to know

How to say,

How i feel.

About those 3 words.''

Things i miss around my house.

2009-04-17T12:51:00.007+10:00

You know what i've been missing since the last 2 months?

1. I miss.. waking up in the morning peacefully and not because i heard my house mom and her son fighting over some useless thing.

2. I miss... when i don't have to make up any reasons when i just want to stay at home and not feel like going for (their) church thingy

3. I miss... when i don't have to hear the bloody footsteps every time people walk in my house. It's darn annoying!

4. I miss... when i can grab food as much as i can from my house's refrigerator. LOL.

5. I miss... having TV in my room. Now i can only entertain myself only with my mac. Boring.

6. I miss... when i don't have to say 'hi om, hi tante' whenever i pass through them in the house. I'm not into unnecessary chit-chat.

7. I miss... when i can do ANYTHING i want. I've found house, but i haven't found home.

8. I miss my mom and dad. I do.

and there's still a lot of things i miss.

I miss my comfort zone.

I know, immature me.

:) :)

2009-04-16T03:33:00.012+10:00

He: Seriously, i don't know what i could do without you.

Me: Ha ha what's that supposed to mean?

He: Let's say... i thank God i found you. I really am.

Hey, your other boys misses you so much! They came up to me few times and asked me, 'Do you miss her?' and even though they didn't actually say it, but i can see 'I miss her so much!' written in their face hahaha.

Sweet!

Let's shake this planet!

2009-04-15T22:12:00.013+10:00

My used-to-high-school-senior (not the ones i wrote before) wrote on my wall: 'Interested for Planetshakers conference?'

Me: YESSSSSS! LET'S GO!!

So, here it is the pics :) Enjoy!

Ms.Piggy (so my mom used to call me). Now, i know why.

The mass.

The band,

Russell Evans shared a very good message about IMAGE :). Will be discussed on the next posting.

Confession:

At first i was like, 'what's his name? Russell who?' LOL

In the middle of the conference,

'Sasha?'

'Yes?'

'I miss you.'

*cried*

''Draw near to Me, My dear.

your surrounding dries you up, you need to be recharged and refreshed every day. Don't let your cup become empty.

Don't pretend you are strong, don't pretend you don't need anyone. your friends maybe far away, but I am here.''

I.cried.myself.out.

I need this.

I've been high, and dry.

I'm not anymore.

What an awesome night session of Planetshakers conference! Plus, it's free. Combo combination.

Off i go,

recharged muSHAdool.

Beaching!

2009-04-11T22:14:00.019+10:00

I went to the beach today, with my housemates Felix and Egot, and my housemate's friend, Christy.

The rest of my housemates and their friends are on some Easter's camp which I'm not interested in at all, so it's only the three of us left in the 'Bong's house' (my houseparents' name) hihi.

We had a looooot of fun :)

What i wore to the beach.. It's kind of cold so i have to wear scarf and jacket :) Hi hi.

We eat first, and no, i didn't eat my hair. I ate chicken teriyaki super nyummy.

Beach is all i need.

I love beach as much i love this blog and you, eyy all my faithful readers. Ha ha.

Hey You! Up there! I give you my heart!

With the guys,

I made this,

One day, i'll write his full name :) When i found one.

The crazy guys made this and note this down, I HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS! hahaha. Not even the idea!!!

Beach is biggest my inspiration where i could just sit, take some cool pics, write some poetic words. LOL.

Left the beach with joyous feeling and grabbed this great drink to freshen up my throat.

Frozen Fanta!

Hey, You!

How could i not fall in love with You?

You and Your artsy hands!

Off i go,

Pinky muSHAdool.

P.S: A true Melbourne friend? Still searching.

I couldn't be happier

2009-04-10T21:43:00.012+10:00

I had this hilarious conversation.

It's between me and one of my boys.

You know, back in high school I was this kind of 'mother' who has lotsa sons and daughters. We're on the same age, actually.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Me: Baaaaabe!

Him: heeeyyyy

bla bla bla and then, we're finally at this topic.

Me: how's the break up thing with her? (His ex)

Him: I'm not over it yet, but i'm fine..

There's one thing.. I'm getting closer with Him you know.. since this break up thing.

Me: REALLY? WAAAA I'M GLAAAAAD!

Him: hahaha..

Me: you know dear, i don't want to sound religious or whatsoever, but the truth is, only Him.

Only Him that always there for you :)

Him: I know...

And you know what, i don't want to be like other kids,

I want to keep saying hi to my ex, and just be a good friend to her.

On the other hand, i want to start my ministry and give my full time to Him.

Coming from this boy, used-to-be one of the bastard in my high school, i couldn't be happier!!

I seriously love my boys (and the girls).

They are the best used-to-high school-mate, the best friends, the best party-goers (ahaha) and they're just the sweetest. Some people i know, they went to some terrible high school with terrible kids. Lucky i didn't. I'm more than lucky to find them.

They were bastards (who wasn't?) but slowly but sure, seems like every used-to-bastards in my high school, they're getting more mature and mature.

Some of them even quit smoking, and go to the gym instead. How good is that?

Anyway,

My boy closed our conversation by this message,

''I'm sorry i have to go, but you take care yahh... Please don't be naughty there, and if you need something to talk to, you can talk to me :)

and.. you are my best friend.''

How sweet.

I guess this is the beauty of investing in other people.

And, i guess if you want to influence your friends, don't try to convert them into some good religious people or something like that, but seriously..

Just be relevant, and be there for them when they need you the most.

I did that.

Quoting Ps. Jose Carol,

''You only can win people's ears if you already win their heart first.''

The day i turned 17 . A little surprise in the morning :)

And i'm more than happy to tell you, the boy with the pinky as* is 'that boy' above.

HA HA.

Darn, i miss them.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

This is what i do when I'm on the train.

2009-04-09T19:02:00.006+10:00

Few weeks ago,

when i was in the train.

This line suddenly came up in my mind,

''Friendship is like when you're on the train.

People may come, people may leave.

But, those who are in the same direction with you will stay.''

Same direction in life,

and same value.

But what if it's different?

nothing you can do.

They'll automatically go away :)

Just don't compromise your value.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

I was talking about them :)

2009-04-08T20:26:00.013+10:00

Earlier this day.....

His status in facebook: Thank Jesus, i nailed it!! I got accepted in my dream university!

Me: Hey, congratulation boyy!! I'm so proud of youuuuuuu!

Him: Thanks, momma. Thanks for praying :)

My status in facebook: What a lovely weather, not good for school mood.

Her: I envy you :(

Later in our chat room

Me: How's San Fransisco thing? Are you still bumped you can't go?

Her: No, I'm fine :)

Me: I know, you're a tough girl.

Her:Hey, you're in the class! Why don't you pay attention to the teacher?!

She put envy aside, attention got inside.

Her: Miss yooooooooouuu!!! *buzzed on facebook too*

Me: Me too. Get ur ass here quick!

Her: Any updates???

She always ask that :)

His blog: He wrote about our conversation :)

I was having a conversation with this friend of mine.

In the middle of it, suddenly she interrupted.
"Sorry Hen, but can I say something to you?? This is not another crap."
"What?"
"You know what, you've been improving a lot. Your aura is calmer and nicer."
"Heh? What dya mean?"
"Umm.. normally when we chat, there is also some point when you speak so bitter. You speak so mean to me. Well, I kinda get used to it, hehe, because I know that's just you. But you're different now, much different."
"Aww.. thanks, *hugs*."
"Yeah, am so proud and happy for you."

I see.
It is true.
When you have your heart fixed.
People can see it.
When you have your heart crippled.
People can also see it.

So what is your decision?
Every time it gets crippled? Do you wanna fix it?
Or let it be?
If you let it be, at some points you'll make others' heart crippled.

That's all.

"Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life." Proverbs 4:23 (KJV).

Yeap, they are my true ones.

I'd be happy to tell you that i still have many others :)

I know. I'm lucky.

Sure, it doesn't guarantee they won't disappoint me one day, but in other 364 days, they've been there :)

How about yours?

The question is,

Have you given something? For your friends?

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Give first, receive later.

2009-04-07T23:23:00.013+10:00

Since last couple of days, i've been doing some research.

A little research.

It focuses on the friendship area (which i can tell you so many things about it) and the object are my friends. :)

I won't make any thesis about this, hell no. It's for my own good, and your own good.

I realized slash found out slash actually-i-do-know-about-this-before-but-im-still-excited about something,

Please, take a look at these scenes.

Scene 1.

A not-good-at-all friend of mine somehow having problem in finding friends (not even the 'true' ones, only the 'only friend' ones) because she's so selfish, so demanding. All she can do is ask ask ask ask ask and rarely answer. She even asked some of her friends to give her something IN PARTICULAR for her bday, and it's costly.

Her friends got her something else

But, she asked her friends 'why didn't you give me something that i wanted? I told you what i want!'

Scene 2.

Another friend of mine is having problem in finding her good friends. Once i hung out with her, no wonder why.

Me: *babbled about something*

Her: What about meeeee? I'm this this this this.

Me: yeah? haha that's funny.

Her: yeah you know my family is this, my friend is this and you know him? he's this this this this.

Me: *shut up and just listened. Suddenly i remembered my sunday school kiddos.*

No, i don't know who they are. Who she's talking about.

Not a clue.

Scene 3.

We were in her car.

Her: hey so how u doin?

Me: I'm......

Her: Wait wait, *get on the phone* heyyyy how r u?? let's go clubbing tomorrow! bla bla bla

*hung up the phone*

So, continue sha.

Me: Yeah I'm grea....

Her: wait wait my friend sent me BBM (BB messenger)

so yeah, you were saying?

Me: Yeah i'm great.....

Her: *another phone call*

Forget it.

From those scenes above, do you see what i see?

Because i see, some people who are really into themselves.

and oh forget about GIVE, all in their head, I WANT TO RECEIVE SOMETHING FROM YOU!

Your ears!

Your times!

Your attention!

I gave them those.

and then i left. Tired being sucked up.

Hey, people!

There are times,

when the subject of the conversation is not always 'I' or 'Me' only!

It won't hurt you to actually ask 'how are you, my friend?'

Sometimes you have to give.

You can simply give them your ears AS WELL,

your attention AS WELL,

your time AS WELL.

believe me, you WILL receive something LATER.

Ever wondering why you don't have so many friends?

Get a mirror.

Ask yourself, 'Did i give something? Have i? Or do i always want something from my friends?'

This is how i manage my friendship,

Sometimes all i need to do to manage the friendship is just.... give my ears. My pleasure to give them those.

But, relationship works two ways, in case you don't know.

I've found my true ones. My two-ways friends. Bye, one-way! Keep sucking.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Plan.plan.plan.

2009-04-07T20:57:00.010+10:00

Plans for easter break (starting this thursday until next wednesday)

1. Sleepover at nadya's new house.

2. Dvd marathon with this 15 years old girl. ahihihi.

2. Going for movie marathon, full day watching movie in cinema of couuurseee with my housemates.

3. Another movie marathon with my used-to-seniors-in-high school.

4. Going to the beach, St. Kilda or even Geelong? Takes few hours though to reach Geelong, but it's beautiful there so i heard.

5. Play basketball with my housemates. Well, it's already an annual thing seeeii. We usually play every thursday or friday.

6. Go find out my campus' cell group. Let's see.

7. Meet up with my old friend, Liendha from my english course few years ago (yeah i know, even me need English course. ahahah, shut up sasha!)

I've been here for awhile but haven't met this skinny old friend of mine. Time to catch up! :)

8. Barbeque with Liendha's friends. I'm not sure about this, i choose my own crowds man. haha. Well, it doesn't work that way here :( newbie oh newbiee...

and....

9. Start doing my assignments. *sigh*

I don't know why, but all these things still pretty lame compare to what I'd do with all my fellas back home.

I mean i can go do ehem other things because I'm old enough in Indonesia and I'm still underage here!!! hix hix hix. (Maksudnya kaya pergi bareng anak-anak gereja ke mana gituuu ahahaha.)

Oh well. Can't wait until my bitch, Winda, Ryska, John? *still a big question mark*, to finally got here and we can do some other stuff hihi.

Easter Break here i comeeeeeeeeeeee,

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

This will keep me warm..... and fashionable. hihi.

2009-04-06T19:42:00.005+10:00

Presenting......

Jimmy Choo's glamour Gumboots!

Ah shoot, it's sold only in UK and US. why not AUS?!!!

Can't afford Choo anyway.

Ohh the pain.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Sit. have a sip.

2009-04-05T21:29:00.010+10:00

Meet up with my used-to-seniors-in-high school, my cousin's friends as well, and had a great time :)

We basically just sat in the middle of melbourne's city, Max Brenner Cafe.

I had a cup of hot chocolate and super large cookie. They have THE BEST CHOCOLATE!

and we just talk, talk, talk and talk. Finally had a conversation which actually i know what is it about. He he.

We talked about their girlfriends, who are actually my girlfriends as well haha (well you know what i mean)

We talked about how sometimes distance could kill us slowly, because we're missing everybody back home every.single.second. Tell me about it!

We talked about our university life and high school life we had, and we all agreed that high school is the best.

We talked about our friends and what they always do when they got drunk. Ha ha.

and go on, on..on.. and on.

That's what i love the most: Quality time.

Please don't give me jewelry,

don't give me dolls (euww, wrong address!),

don't give me anything.

Just sit with me,

have a sip.

Let's just talk.

Hot chocolate lover,

muSHadool.

What twitter is for : A reminder.

2009-04-04T17:00:00.008+11:00

''Only dead fish go with the flow.''

-Ryan Seacrest on his twitter.

Don't go with the flow, go ACROSS the flow.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Dead with envy.

2009-04-03T18:49:00.007+11:00

My sister on Facebook:

Hey do you know that Dad, Mom, your second sister and your nephew are going to Singapore?

That's one.

My friend, Sara:

Hey, are you going home on holiday? 2 camps will be held in upcoming months.

That's two.

My other friend, Elbert:

Yeah, I'm going to Hillsong Conference on July. Aren't you?

Me: No. I have school. *SOBS!!*

That's three.

My other friend, Henry:

Yeah, i'm going to have a blast tonight. I'm going to Oakenfold, Segarra for some party.

Me: yeah yeah yeah.. you better kill me. I spend friday night by STAYING AT HOME!

That's four.

My housemate, Claresta:

Bye, shaaa.. I'm going for camp for the next 3 days!

That's five.

KILL ME! KILL ME NOW!!!!

I'm full with this!

*Sigh*

I think i'll just go with Jennifer tomorrow to Chadstone shopping mall, really bored!

However,

have a nice weekend fellas!

I maybe envy you noww, but i know someday you will too! hahaha.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

I want VT - Venisha Tjie!

2009-04-03T13:20:00.010+11:00

Put your own monogram on this loooovely Louis Vuitton bag! Custom-made specially for ya!

Price: $700 without monogram.

$1000 with monogram.

I know what i want for this 24th of August.

In case you don't know, that's when i turn 18.

Partay babehh! LOL

Off i go,

muSHAdool.

Meet my design classmates.

2009-04-02T23:58:00.012+11:00

We were asked to take 5 pictures of ourselves doing some weird pose, in groups of 2-3 people.

So, here, meet my group.

Meet Will. He didn't have any problem with posing at all!

Meet Becki, the elastic girl. haha.

Me, oh-shoot-i-forgot-her-name, and stefanie.

It was fun. :)

But, no. I don't hang out with them. LOL.

Off i go,

muSHAdool.